Yes, Virginia...

I am in the beautiful city of Roanoke, Virginia.  Why, you ask?  I am here to select the next Miss Virginia!
And did you know that Virginia is for lovers?  Who knew?

I have been asked to be a part of the judges panel that will select the next Miss Virginia to compete in the Miss America pageant.  (I believe I have explained my involvement in pageants, right?) Tonight, we all met the contestants for the first time. Or should I say, they met us.  Or should I say, they got a load of me.  The ladies were all dolled up in evening gowns and the 6 judges went around and met each one face to face and had a quick chit chat with them. I think I was too much for some of these girls.  I was throwing out some of my best sarcastic one liners and bless their hearts, some of them just didn't know how to react.  But then again, some of them did.

Tomorrow is a big day for the contestants... the all important personal interview competition. Each contestant will have 10 minutes for a grueling question and answer period. The questions can be about anything the judge wants to ask. (re: politics, social issues, personal opinions, etc.)  So, time for me to ratchet it down a bit and not be so sarcastic. And sardonic. And acerbic. And bitter.  I need a happy pill.

Here are some questions I am thinking about: 
Who is afraid of VIRGINIA Wolfe?
Where is VIRGINIA and why didn't she fix that ham that I have heard so much about?
VIRGINIA MADSEN or VIRGINIA MAYO?
VIRGINIA???  I don't even know ya!

What would Betty say?  "Charles and I drove through Virginia once." And then she would add: "Are they paying you for this?" And then she would chastise me for doing all these things that don't make me any money. Which would segue into "I told you to major in business, instead of that The-a-ter".